Anger is a completely normal, usually healthy, human emotion. But when it gets
out of control and turns destructive, it can lead to problems-problems at work,
in your personal relationships, and in the overall quality of your life. And it
can make you feel as though you’re at the mercy of an unpredictable and powerful
emotion. Anger is a very powerful emotion that can stem from feelings of
frustration, hurt, annoyance, or disappointment. It is a normal human emotion
that can range from slight irritation to strong rage. Suppressed anger can be an
underlying cause of anxiety and depression. Anger that is not appropriately
expressed can disrupt relationships, affect thinking and behavior patterns, and
create a variety of physical problems. Chronic (long-term) anger has been linked
to health issues such as high blood pressure, heart problems, headaches, skin
disorders, and digestive problems. In addition, anger can be linked to problems
such as crime, emotional and physical abuse, and other violent behavior.
NLP AND ANGER MANAGEMENT
When you start feeling angry, try deep breathing,
positive self-talk, or stopping your angry thoughts. Breathe deeply from
your diaphragm. Slowly repeat a calm word or phrase such as “relax” or “take
it easy.” Repeat it to yourself while breathing deeply until the anger
Although expressing anger is better than keeping it in, anger should be
expressed in an appropriate way. Frequent outbursts of anger are often
counter-productive and cause problems in relationships with others. Anger
outbursts are also stressful to your nervous and cardiovascular systems and
can make health problems worse. Learning how to use assertiveness is the
healthy way to express your feelings, needs, and preferences. Being
assertive can be used in place of using anger in these situations.
Seek out the support of others. Talk through your feelings and try to work
on changing your behaviors.
If you have trouble realizing when you are having angry thoughts, keep a log
of when you feel angry.
Try to gain a different perspective by putting yourself in another’s place.
Learn how to laugh at yourself and see humor in situations.
Practice good listening skills. Listening can help improve communication and
can facilitate trusting feelings between people. This trust can help you
deal with potentially hostile emotions.
Learn to assert yourself, expressing your feelings calmly and directly
without becoming defensive, hostile, or emotionally charged. Consult
self-help books on assertiveness or seek help from a professional therapist
to learn how to use assertiveness and anger management skills.